The Conspiracy Continues



What are they doing with the alphabet? We started with alpha, then beta. That, I understood. Then, there was a jump to delta. Why did they skip gamma? Then, there was a very big jump to omicron. Now, there’s flurona. Okay, it’s not really a variant, so we can’t include that in the alphabet. But then, where in the land of alphabets is IHU? Should it not be iota or upsilon? Is it not bad enough that the kids don’t get the best of education in having kept from in person classes? Now, they’re getting confused with the Greek alphabet. How will they organize and join fraternities and sororities? It will be this generation’s fault if some of them grow up and later starts Flurona Alpha Tau fraternity because they thought it’s a Greek alphabet, or they decide to start IHU Chi Mu brotherhood. Along with the New Year surge (if some health official claims this isn’t a surge yet, I don’t know what would be) is another surge, a surge of conspiracy theories. Let’s look at the new ones and some of the old ones.


Boost the Booster Theory


According to the Boost the Booster Theory, the government is staging a surge with probably fake numbers of active cases and infections to cause fear and panic among the public to instigate them to get the booster shots which recently have been given to those who have been vaccinated. The theory further goes that the government or the powers that be (or maybe the Illuminati) have pushed this panic to prevent the waste of the large funds spent on the purchase of the booster shots. To avert the booster shots from not being used because people may not opt to get them, a fake surge was played. So, by implication, all the numbers are fake. There’s no cause for concern. Government just wants to use up all the booster shots.


Mo’ Infection, No Election


This one has some similarity with the Boost the Booster theory. According to the Mo Infection, No Election Theory, all the numbers are staged. The government, especially the Duterte administration is hyping up the alert, the alarm, the risk, the panic, the fear, the paranoia, to legitimize, justify a postponement or cancellation of the scheduled elections. This is built on the premise that the administration party doesn’t have an endorsed presidential candidate, not even a vice presidential candidate. (Actually, in a technical sense, the administration party has a presidential candidate and that is Sen. Manny Paquiao because he’s with PDP Laban. It’s the Cusi wing which doesn’t have a candidate. In the absence of a candidate, logic dictates that they go with Paquiao.) Since President Duterte and his cronies don’t have a candidate, it is definite that the winning presidential candidate will not be a member of their party or faction, thereby discontinuing their dynasty or stay in power or immunity or whatever you may call it. What about Sarah Duterte you ask? The president’s daughter seems to have a very independent mind of her own that father and daughter seem to mutually shock each other with their decisions of filing and withdrawing. So, according to this theory, eventually, the surge will be used as basis for putting off the elections. This reminds me of that theory that then President Marcos initiated the Plaza Miranda bombing to validate the declaration of Martial Law.


Now, let’s look at some classic ones.


Vaccination of the Zombie Apocalypse


You’ve probably heard this. I actually thought that this is just a joke. But it turns out that some people really, honestly believe that the vaccines would turn us into mindless zombies. I know some adherents to this belief who have abandoned this cultic credence, and have long since received the shots. But some people still hold on to faith on this theory. The proponents must have watched too much Walking Dead or Train to Busan. A large portion of the population have already been fully vaccinated and we’re not walking zombies; or maybe we’ve already become automatons and we just don’t know it. Another variant of this is the Microchip Theory.


I wonder from what hat do people pull this theories from. These must have come from the imaginative paranoid minds that are scared of disproportionately perceived problems of the vaccine and the suspicious distrust towards the current administration. Are hands are already full of the anxiety caused by the sudden spread, then it is further augmented with concoctions of conspiracies. Some people actually have their blood pressure shooting up that they’re starting to get medication for it.


“The LORD detests lying lips, but he delights in people who are trustworthy.” -Proverbs 12:22