Book Series: SENIOR MOMENTS ARE FOREVER

43rd MOMENT: Manila Bay, Coffee Shop and Lion Tamer

--------------------------- Manila bay rehabilitation: Nature has created the Manila Bay, man destroyed it, technology is being used to restore it, science will show if we are successful, but time will be the one to tell all. --------------------------- Applying for job: A job applicant was rejected immediately even before the start of his interview when he asked his interviewer- “By the way sir, what is the name of this company?” --------------------------- Foreign FBFs: My FB friends from other countries are asking me to translate the Filipino words that I use in some of my posts into English so that they will also understand why they are laughing! --------------------------- My motto: If something good in life will happen it will happen - if I will work for it. If bad thing in my life will happen it will happen even - if I do not work for it. --------------------------- OK THIS IS NOT MY OROGINA, two gamblers trying to outwit each other: Gambler 1: “I bet P1000 I can bite my eyes.” Gambler 2: thinking it’s impossible: “OK Deal”! Gambler 1: pulled out his fake left eye and put it in his mouth. Gambler 2: thinking to get back his loss: “Ok I lost, but I bet you P2000 you cannot bite your right ear”! Gambler 1: “Ok I will give you a chance to get back your money”. He removed his false teeth and bite his right ear. Gambler 2 punched Gambler 1. --------------------------- Narinig ko 2 teenagers na babae naguusap: Teen 1: “Besh ano bang mga questions ang tinatanong sa pregnancy test”. Teen 2: “di ko alam Besh, buy na lang tau ng reviewer para mka pag review tau.” --------------------------- Adaptation of Peter’s principle: People reach their level of incompetence when they start believing in their own competence. --------------------------- A product for girls being sold online: a lipstick that gives a signal whether a guy that a girl will kiss is really in love with her. --------------------------- Sa isang medical clinic: Doctor: “O maganda ang health mo sir, ayos ang lahat. Malakas ka sa edad mong yan na 65. Pasyente: “Eh marating ko kaya Doc ang edad na 85? Doctor: “Nag e-exercise ka ba lagi, jog or walking, swim, pasyal sa parks o malls, laro ng golf o kahit anong gusto mong sports, manood ng sine, basketball, makipag party party?” Pasyente: “Hindi doc, wala akong hilig sa mga yan.” Doctor: “Eh bakit gusto mong mka rating ng 85 wala ka naman palang gagawin sa buhay mo!” --------------------------- Magkasintahan nag-uusap sa park: Girl: “Ang tagal na natin sweetheart, mag-usap naman tau ng kinabukasan.” Boy: “Kinabukasan tulad ng wala ng traffic kc may lumilipad ng mga sasakyan? Kasambahay ay mga robots na? Di na kailangan ang bigas kc tablets na lng pagkain ng tao?” Girl: “Pag dating ng araw na yon tatadtarin kita at gagawin kitang tableta!” --------------------------- Coffee shaop talk: One day dumating na si kamatayan ang pinaka mayaman na owner ng coffee shop. Negosyante: “Poong kamatayan hihingi po ako sau ng konting palugit, mga ilang araw lng para asikasuhin ko ang negosyo ko. Pasok muna kau sa office ko, may computer doon puede kaung maglaro kahit ano. Uminum ka muna ng pinaka masarap na coffee sa boung mundo”. Pinagbigyan ni kamatayan ang negosyante, pumasok sa office at doon sya binigyan ng coffee. Nang nasa office room si kamatayan binuksan ng negosyante ang Folder 201 ng mga naka schedule na mamatay. Kinuha ang file nya at sinuksok sa ilalim. Lumabas si kamatayan na nasisiyahan. Kamatayan: “Sarap talaga ng coffee mo, kaya dahil dyan ay pagbibigyan ko ang kahilingan mo.” Binuksan ni kamatayan ang 201 Folder nya at binaliktad ang files. Kamatayan- “O ayan nsa hulihan na file mo” --------------------------- Mission in life: A classmate told me not to die yet. But I read one philosopher that our mission in life is only to accomplish five things: have a family, plant at least one tree, take care of at least one animal, help one needy and, write a book. OMG, I have accomplished all the 5 already, quota na ako, and a book? I have already written 3! I can die anytime now. Thank the Almighty. --------------------------- Circus job applicant: Sa isang circus may nag apply na trainer ng hayop. Pinakita sa kanya ng manager kng papano nagpapahalik ang trainer sa isang leon. Manager sa applicant: “O yan kaya mo ba yan?” Applicant: “Kayang kaya po, pa alisin nyo lang po ang leon.” ---------------------------